Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Fuck College

I moved to [North] Las Vegas my sophomore year; prior to that, I lived in [Southern] California . I have so much love for Vegas but my love for SoCal is even GREATER . I always loved visitin' Vegas but livin' here ? That's a whole 'nother idea I can't seem to accept . I got some real cool, laid back friends here but it's just damn, SoCal is still on my mind no matter who I meet here, what happens here, etc .

I never planned on stayin' here . Even right before we got settled here, when I found out we were movin' here, I promised my friends [& myself] that I'd move back to Cali as soon as I get done with high school . People here always act surprised that I wanna move back there . I don't see how though; I ALWAYS talk about California, how much I love it, how bad I wanna move there, etc . Shit I even got "L.A." tatted on me . But what I don't get is : the people who CONSTANTLY act surprised no matter how much I tell 'em 'bout movin' back to Cali, are my PARENTS .

Now that I finally got done with high school, I told my parents (for the 43243rd time), that I wanna move back to Cali and go to college [just to make 'em happy at least] there . But ugh, now school's startin' again and I had to make a fuckin' quick decision and change my plans; yes I have to stay here and go to college here . . It stresses me out though . . cuz I feel like it fucked up SOO MANY of my future plans . .

I guess I'll just have to get through it . . FUCK until fuckin' December . . but after this Fall Semester, I'm fuckin' movin' out fo' sho' . I made it clear to my fuckin' parents and they better go with that . Part of the reason (BIG REASON) why I wanna move the fuck out is cuz . . I'm just tired of my parents' supervision . I can't do ANYTHING without them havin' to constantly watch what I fuckin' do; I can't make my own decisions all the time cuz I gotta watch out what I do for them . . and it holds me back from sooo many fuckin' things . .

But seriously, I don't even wanna go to college to be honest . . I mean I DO but shit, that shit's too fuckin' expensive . . I can be doin' somethin' else [in Cali]; focus on my dreams of tattooing and music . My parents just don't believe in my dreams and they think college is always the only way to succeed . If I didn't need to go to college, I'd be soo focused on my music and tattooing cuz I don't need to worry 'bout grades, payin' for college, being busy on shit I don't wanna do . . FUCK, the setbacks . .

-M.C.

1 comment:

  1. i understand how u feel about college life and being on a place where ur not really happy doing things for ur future...look at me now can u imagine me cuz,im STILL in college for 5 yrs already and supposed to be my course is only good for 4 yrs..wat sucks more is i dont really have a passion on my chosen course, im already in my senior yr when i realize..i should have been an architect or an interior designer by now...but i know in my heart its never too late..
    I know we grew up in different culture but if only Las Vegas is one jeepney away..i think me and zeus can help you and guide you in having a college life...good and bad side of it..
    cuz im not being biased, i understand how u felt about ur parents(ur not my only cuzin hu has dat kind of problem, my frends parents are even worst)but u shud remember being a Filipino..our parents only wants wats best(maybe at times dey thought they knew everything) always kip in mind "education lang ang mapapamana sau ng parents mo dat nobody cant take it away from u".. for us here,my parents provides us wat we need but its still our choice of course(too bad i just copied my bestfrend's course back then)in college...i think they just wanna make sure u can have a chance for a much better future as compare to ur generation now adays...dont take it against them G...Let them know how u feel in a good way so they can understand you instead of misinterpreting your words..in the end u'll both can compromise on each others choices...U may have mature sooner than we thought but at the end of the day, ur still a young adult just starting to learn more things, more serious things about the reality of life...
    Piece of advice to my beloved cuz, choose the right kind of course for you, choose the path where you can be passionate with even though there's a rough road in between...no one succeed's without hardwork and determination...
    you may not havedone wat accdg to ur plans but it doesnt mean u cant pursue dem, maybe just not now, or why dont you try both staying in college but still doing ur thing...u only have one life and live it to the fullest without regrets...cuz i miss u soo much and how i wish u had an ate back there to guide u or at least someone u can talk to when it cums to family matters...so i can make u and them understand each other...take care and i hope all the things ive said helps...love u cuz! =)

    -ateaub-

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